You just clicked your mouse 162 times!
Hope I didn't wear it out.

Here is the poem that you just read!

I wrote this poem,
To drive you mad.
And when it is over,
I'm sure you'll be glad.

Just keep on clicking,
And I promise it will end.
And when it's all done,
Pass it on to a friend.

Make sure that they suffer,
Like my poem made you.
And I am quite sure,
They'll pass it on too.

To annoy someone else,
With my crazy rhyme.
I hope for their sake,
That they have the time.

To click all these clicks,
And read all these lines.
Within a few days,
You'll hear all their whines.

They'll moan and cry,
'Cuz you sent them this link.
They might even tell you,
They think that you stink.

Tell you it's mean,
To do this to them.
They might even say,
You're a real gem.

Get them stuck here,
Like this one made you.
Make them so annoyed,
Their face will turn blue.

They'll pull out their hair,
And scream out your name.
They'll probably even phone you,
'Cuz you are to blame.

For sending this page,
To annoy them too.
Like clicking the link,
Let me annoy you.

Hey! You were warned,
When you read the name.
But you clicked the link,
Just the same.

You wanted to be annoyed,
Or you wouldn't be here.
But now that you are,
You're stuck I fear.

Stuck at my poem,
Reading each line.
But I am just starting,
And that is just fine.

Just fine for me,
'Cuz I'm writing it.
But probably by now,
You're having a snit.

Snit fit that is,
Going crazy with your mouse.
Ready to scream,
And run through the house.

But please do not worry,
I promise it will end.
Really I do!!
By next weekend!

No really now,
Almost half through.
Half way? You ask.
Yes, it is true.

I can't let you off easy,
From reading this page.
And letting my poem,
Fill you with rage.

Rip out your phone,
Tear off your mouse.
Throw your keyboard,
Out of the house.

Screaming out loud,
It's A Crying Shame!
That I'm stuck at this page,
And Andy's to blame.

For sticking me here,
Clicking this page.
Almost as bad,
As a bird in a cage.

You're stuck here,
Until I let you go.
When will that happen?
Only I know.

Because I wrote the poem,
That you have to read.
Is it annoying?
Are you ready to plead?

Please let me stop,
Clicking for the next.
I don't want to read,
More of this text.

It's driving me mad,
I'm going insane!
Please no more clicks,
You're clogging my brain.

I will tell you this,
You're at least half way.
So please read the rest,
I'm sure you will stay.

To be more annoyed,
By my longest poem ever.
But will you return?
Probably NEVER!

But please just remember,
You were stuck here once.
By one of my special,
JavaScript stunts.

So have a great day,
And I hope you enjoyed.
Reading my poem,
And being annoyed.

Ha! Did you think,
I'd just let you go?
I'll tell you right now,
The answer is NO!

I can't let you leave,
You're stuck here for sure.
Clicking the button,
Is the only cure.

You can't close the page,
And exit my site.
You never can tell,
It might take all night!

I wouldn't do that,
Because you couldn't come back.
You'd probably keel over,
With a heart attack.

You're getting real close,
To the end of my rhyme.
Just a few more words,
While I have the time.

What am I saying?
I can keep you here!
While I sit back and laugh!
And you click in fear.

Will it end now?
Or ten clicks away?
Tell me how long,
Will he make me stay!!

Is your finger sore?
From clicking your mouse?
Are you screaming at me?
And running through the house?

Okay, I'll be nice,
And let you go free.
You've been here enough.
So I'll let you be!

But please let me know,
What you thought of this page.
Did it just make you laugh?
Or fill you with rage?

Written by William A. Lumbert © 2000


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